Lessons Learned in the School of Adversity

I am not yet as Job, or Abraham, or my pioneer ancestors, but I have lived long enough to call Trouble my friend. I’d like to share some personal things I’ve learned in the school of adversity, and the bumper stickers that see me through.

• Adversity happens.
Ann Landers, after decades of dishing out daily advice in her newspaper column, said this: “If I were asked to give what I consider to be the single most useful bit of advice for all humanity, it would be this: Expect trouble -- as an inevitable part of life…”

Somewhere we got the idea that the norm, or the ideal life, is one of ease and comfort, and that trials are the aberration that get in our way, but I think we have that backwards. (1 Peter 4:12)

• I’ve learned that lots of things can go wrong at once, and some things can go very wrong, but never does everything go wrong all at the same time. There are always blessings to be counted, things that are right, and evidence of God’s grace in our life.

• It could always be worse. Last week we had a plumbing leak at our house. A few days later I heard of someone whose whole house flooded. Even that can’t compare to having your house washed away in a hurricane -–which is nothing next to the loss of a soul.

• When I feel sorry for myself I think of the pioneers, and so many other times and places where people have suffered so awfully much. It puts my own problems into perspective.

• When you are suffering, you can choose to go around with a long face, or not. You have a choice. Pain is inevitable; misery is optional. Laughing is better than crying; it’s more fun and your makeup doesn’t run.

• Play it as it lays. We can waste a lot of time, energy and happiness by wishing things were different. It’s a lot more productive and peaceful to accept things as they really are, and go from there.

• Good things come out of bad things. For those who have eyes to see, doors will open, good will come, Beauty will rise out of the ashes. (Isaiah 61:3)

• Fear and worry cannot coexist with faith. You must choose one or the other. I like faith; it feels better. And when I cannot find it within myself, I pray for it.

• You can endure a lot more than you think you can, or want to. We’re fond of saying we’re afraid we could never have been a pioneer, but I wonder if we aren’t more afraid that we could!

• Although you may feel alone, you are never ever really alone. We do not suffer out of God’s view. No one else may know of our pain, but He does.

• Adversity strips the fluff down to the real stuff. The vain and trivial melt away, and we are left with the real us, real life, and those things that really matter.

• There is peace in the eye of the storm. "We are troubled on every side, yet not distressed; we are perplexed, but not in despair, cast down, but not destroyed. " 2 Corinthians 4:8-9 Whatever storms are raging around us, we can find peace. I have been in that place.

• Adversity is not fun! No matter how much we know about it, and understand its purposes and promises, it still is not any fun at all. In fact, the pain is very real, and it can be really hard.

• This too shall pass, though not always in this lifetime. There are things we live through, and things we live with. But for the faithful, nothing bad lasts forever, and nothing can ever go permanently wrong.

• We can trust in the Lord that there is purpose in all things.
The sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us. And we know that all things work together for the good to them that love God. Romans 8:18, 28

• It took me a long time, but I’ve learned that Adversity is a gift.

1. To know ourselves—to know of what stuff we are made and what we can be.
“No pain that we suffer, no trial that we experience is wasted. It ministers to our education, to the development of … patience, faith, fortitude, and humility. All that we suffer and all that we endure builds up our characters, purifies our hearts, expands our souls, and makes us more charitable, more worthy to be called the children of God. “ Orson F. Whitney

2. To know others. It is through our common woes that we find love and compassion and friendship in meaningful ways.

3. To know God. “We know about our Savior, but it is often in our adversities that we truly find Him and know Him and love Him… “ Ardeth Kapp, “Pray Not for Light Burdens but for Strong Backs” BYUWC 2005



And so, Affliction comes to us all—
Not to make us sad, but to make us sober;
Not to make us sorry, but to make us wise;
Not to overcome us, but for us to overcome;
Not to punish, but to bless.