Do It!

Spencer W. Kimball said:

"I urge all of the people of this church to give serious attention to their
family histories, to encourage their parents and grandparents to write their
journals, and let no family go into eternity without having left their memoirs
for their children, their grandchildren, and their posterity. This is a
duty and a responsibility..”

Does blogging count?

Just wondering....

Boy, did my day slip away from me . Every time I thought 20 minutes had passed, it had been an hour. Have you ever had a day like that? ...like someone is pushing the hands on your clock faster than they are supposed to go?

I skipped out on socializing and went to Barnes and Noble. There were whole families just sitting around reading at 11:00 at night! Would you do that with your family?
I sometimes think I would like to live there. You know me: I would come out at night after it closed, like a mouse. ... or a cockroach.

When I got home, I had the winter hibernation hungries. Am I the only one that is hungrier in the winter, and feel like I need more food? Maybe it has something to do with keeping warm. Don't know why I have it in Texas. Makes me look like a roly-poly bear.

A new paperback just came out called "Crap Jobs." Some of the worst jobs you can have include gravedigger, janitor's assistant, watercress farmer, turkey beheader, pallett maker, It's a Small World ride operator, rat catcher, Body Recovery Detail for NYPD, maggot farmer, Saddam Hussein look-a-like, walking menu, salmon head slicer, pea checker, box stacker, or Sherpa (1 in 20 chance of dying daily). I thought it made stay-at-home mom sound pretty good. But the more I thought, --I think mothers do most of those things. Am I right!?!?!?

Thanks for listening.

Think of Sheri Dew's Kansas Grandparents

I live a fairly small and simple life. I live in a small town, live paycheck to paycheck, work part-time in a small business, teach and serve in my church, and am too tired or lazy to do much else, and yet I feel my life is so very rich. I have great relationships with my large, extended family. I have great friends, even if I don’t have much time for them. I live in a place and time of peace and comfort, of unending choices of what I want to think, and do, and become. I read good books and have great conversations and strive to better myself physically, mentally and spiritually. It may not appear so to some, but I have meaningful work to do as I nurture family, support a growing business, and teach and help others along their eternal journey. I want for nothing and have reason to get out of bed in the morning, which for me is saying a lot.

I believe in the Law of the Harvest, that from very small seeds God can and does multiply and grow many and great things. It is the small things in life that matter most, for out of small things are great things brought to pass. I’ve seen it in my own life, and the lives of others. The Master Gardener blesses everything He touches with great abundance. His Spirit magnifies and graces all things. And we reap the benefits. I am grateful for my small but rich and abundant life.

ET, Phone Home

One of the goals I chose when working on Personal Progress as a YW leader was to write to my mother every week. I was always close to my mother, but I didn’t get to see or talk to her very often.
The next time I saw my mother after I had been writing her, our meeting was especially poignant and sweet because we had been in touch, we knew more of each other’s lives, and we saw in each other’s eyes the greater closeness that we felt.

We don’t write letters any more. We email or blog.
But I know that the next time I see Jennifer or Elizabeth or Jill, that our meeting will be more joyful and sweet because we have been in touch.

I think prayer works that way. We talk to Heavenly Father so that we know something of Him, and know that he’s aware of us, and we feel connected.
And on that glorious day when we meet Him face to face, it will be all the more powerful and joyful and sweet because we have been in touch. We will see in each other's eyes the familiarity, the closeness, and the love. So be it.

For stay-at-home moms

From a cartoon strip:

MMMM—There’s nothing sweeter than the smell of a freshly bathed baby! --Or more satisfying than knowing the housework’s done.

There’s nothing more compelling than the look in a little child’s eyes, or more fulfilling than seeing them thrive in your care!

What words can describe the intense and special feeling a mother has after being at home with her baby all day? ---

GET ME OUT OF HERE!!!!

Struggling Faith

I thought for a long time that I didn’t have much faith.
Oh, I was plenty faith-ful. I attended church, did my callings, kept the commandments.
But I didn’t feel I had the kind of faith that could draw down the powers of heaven.
Then I read Joseph Smith’s definition of faith: faith is “the principle of action,” –it is the reason why we do things!
I realized that every day I was making choices and doing things because of what I believed to be true. I was living my whole life based on principles and ideas and promises that I counted on. Everything I was doing and teaching my children stemmed from those beliefs. I knew then that I had faith! Faith in Heavenly Father and His plan, faith in Jesus Christ and His redeeming powers, faith that what I do really does matter.
What a relief, to know that I had faith. And I have since learned to draw on the powers of Heaven. I can’t move mountains yet, but I can, and do, exercise my faith every day of my life.

“Faith is to believe what we do not see,

and the reward of this faith is to see

what we believe.” --St.Augustine

"I Vant to Be Alone" --Greta Garbo

I grew up in the middle of a large family, and had a large family of my own.
All I ever wanted was to live alone.
It’s not that I ever minded living with people—all 7 siblings and 5 roommates for five years or 8 children of my own. Or that I didn’t get along with them. I just wanted to live alone.
I got to live alone just once, and only for a few months. It was in a one-bedroom apartment in Las Vegas that cost me $150.00/month. I bought a teensy TV—I’m sure it was only six inches—and at Christmas time I hung a string of colored lights on the wall in the shape of a tree. I lived on melted cheese sandwiches on English muffins and brown bread with cream cheese-- and an occasional salad.
And then some girls needed one more roommate, and from there I went into marriage.
I’m glad that I had that time alone, but I’m not sorry it wasn’t more.
Living with lots of people has been fun, it has been an education, it has provided endless variety, and it has made me a better person.
And guess what? I have no desire to live alone any more.
So, where did everybody go?

Food for Adults

As you can imagine, with 8 kids we ate a lot of hamburger and mac and cheese.
I finally realized, I don’t really like hamburger, or a lot of other things we ate most of our life.
So while my kids may long for the comfort foods of their childhood, I long for different.
Tonight for dinner we had cranberry meatballs and baked celery (yum!). When I’m alone I have shrimp cacciatore. I can’t wait to try my friend’s baked apricots for a side dish.
You can’t feed that stuff to kids. But you can sure enjoy it when they’re gone.

The Essence of Self

What,
apart from
the eternal clutter
of my everyday living,
should
be
the essence
of my life?

This is a question that has taunted me from the front cover of my journal for years.

Women like to drive the nails in even further, so I have also wondered:

What,
apart from the many and varied roles I play,
Is the essence of my
true self?

What,
apart from the social, political, economic, religious, and cultural
conditions of my life,
Is the essence of my eternal soul?
Had I been born
in another time or place, what would I be like?

What,
apart from the clutter of my church experience,
Is the essence of
my true religion, my personal belief system?

Who,
Apart from my body size and shape, my age and hair type, and the
clothes I wear or wish I could wear or think I should wear,
Is the real me?

External things shape so much who we think we are.

When all that clutter
is stripped away, what is left?

My Time

I grew up in a large family, and had a large family of my own, and rarely did I have time to call my own. So I became a night owl.
It started when I was growing up, with summer contests of who could stay up the latest, as we all fell asleep in front of the test pattern after the late-late movie ended.
In my early teens I tried to stay up as late as my oldest sister, which was the middle of the night. I learned to love quiet hours I had it to myself.
In college I would schedule classes late, so I could stay up after my roommates went to bed.
When I had children of my own, the ONLY time I had to myself was late at night. When they were older, I sometimes let one or two or three of them stay up for quiet late-night talks. Those were good times.
I seem to wake up when the sun goes down, when the kids go down, when the phone stops ringing. My mind seems to clear. Somehow I find myself in those quiet hours. It certainly is when I can think and pray and feel the Spirit.
The kids are grown and gone, my nest is empty, and I still go to bed after 1:00 most nights.
They say it’s just habit, that it can be changed. Maybe because my body has done it for so long, I don’t think so.
Perhaps in my previous life I was an owl. Perhaps, if you listen, you might even hear me hoot.

My Cave

It’s a real mess. An indication of my mind-state, I’m sure. But it’s mine.
It’s an upstairs bedroom I claimed when the kids moved out.
We don’t know what to call it. Craft room—but I don’t do crafts. Sewing room—but I don’t sew much. Work room isn’t much more accurate. My friend calls it my Cave.
I grew up in the middle of a large family, and then I had a large family. Rarely did I have a space to call my own.
One of my very favorite Christmas presents growing up was a desk. I knew it was a refurnished hand-me-down, but that didn’t take away my pure delight at having my own space. I spent hours at it.
I was thrilled when I finally got my own room in the basement, even if it was dark and spider-y. I spent hours and hours there. “Hermit” and “recluse” come to mind.
I never really realized how important it was to me until decades later when I got my Cave. It’s my own space, my own mess, my place to go and do my things. I’m surrounded by my books, files, projects, family history, and sundries.
When too many kids come home for Christmas and I have to pack it up and push things aside to put a blow-up bed in it, it’s okay, but I feel lost, and am really glad when I get it back.
It has become my favorite room in the house, disaster that it is. It’s where I work on talks and lessons, study, pay bills, have my computer. If it doesn’t have to be done in the kitchen or laundry room, I do it in my room. Visitors are allowed, but can’t criticize the mess. It’s mine, mine, mine, and I’m happy there.

Questions that stir up my identity crisis

Four jobs you have had in your life:
1. Receptionist (summer fill-in) at my Dad's doctor's office.
2. Para-psychologist in psychiatric wing of Salt Lake Hospital where my Dad first worked after med school and where my older siblings were born.
3. Selling marriage licenses in Las Vegas, until I moved upstairs to be a juvenile court clerk
4. Delivered newspapers and phone books, worked for census bureau, gave out samples in stores, and now work in a longarm machine quilting business (not quilting).

Four movies you would watch over and over:
1. Sabrina, the new one
2. Entrapment
3. I like period pieces, musicals and action movies, but
4. inspite of having no memory, I prefer to watch a movie I haven't seen before.

Four places you have lived:
1. Kitsap County, Washington. Raised in Bremerton; raised kids in Poulsbo.
2. Las Vegas, Nevada
3. Provo, Utah
4. McKinney, Texas
5. Antelope, California. OK, so I can't fit into the box of 4 things. I can't follow recipes either.

Four TV shows you love to watch:
1. Wheel of Fortune
2. Who Wants to be a Millionaire
3.
4.

Four places you have been on vacation:
1. Disneyland
2. New Orleans, Louisiana
3. San Antonio, Texas Riverwalk
4. Cross-country in a VW Bug with college roommate Elizabeth. We stayed at KOAs in a pup tent. Saw lotsa things between the west and east coasts, including Canada.

Four websites you visit daily:
1. Hotmail
2. Blogspot
3.
4.

Four of your favorite foods:
1. Brownies
2. Pizza
3. Bread
4. Dinner out

Four places you would rather be right now:
1. Visiting any one of my kids in Utah, Washington or Arizona
2. On a trip to most anywhere
3. In bed reading a book
4. At a good movie

Somebody Loves Me

Today I feel loved. My hubby brought me fresh raspberries, and my Jennifer set up my blog. Such gifts. And, my book club books came in the mail. What could be better than that. Happy day!

Why I Don't (Didn't) Have a Blog

In answer to one of Jill's questions:

Why I haven’t started a blog:
Time. No, that really isn’t it. It’s that I have SO much to do: besides the daily work of eating, cleaning, going to work, nurturing relationships, 1500 stagnating emails, piles of junk mail, and bodily care, I have a sometimes-demanding church calling that eats up my “spare” time; I have two stories of house filled with closets and boxes that need to be gone through, cleaned up and organized; the same dust and papers have been on my bookshelves and nightstand for years; I haven’t put a picture in a scrapbook in almost seven years now; ancestors from the other side of the veil are screaming to have their temple work done; I have neglected friends who need my attention and those whose attention I would like. I already spend too much selfish time on my computer; and there are so many books to be read.
The raw truth is that I am tired and unmotivated and really bad at getting much done in a day. So maybe the real issue is guilt, or unworthiness, that makes me feel that I can’t take time for something I just want to do. I am just so far behind that I can’t ever die!

And, I’ve considered the privacy issue, but I like to think no one would read it but Jennifer and Elizabeth, maybe Angela. Even that may be too public for how tedious I can be.

Why I’d like to start a blog:
Because I love Jennifer’s and Jill’s so much.
Because frankly, Jill’s daily questions spark my interest. I’m trying to face the issue that, at this late date in my life, I still don’t know who I am. I’m thinking that journaling and writing memories and feelings might be one way to put myself in touch with the person hiding deep inside me, as well as being more in touch with those I love most. At the least, it would account for the days of my life and me as a person. But, alas, I must go do laundry, clean my oven, write a talk, call my sister, etc. etc. etc. So TTFN.